Life As My Dawg

I recently (yesterday) decided it was time to protect some of my babies. By “babies”, I mean my posted photos, and by “protect”, I mean I essentially pee’d on my photos so none of you dawgs will borrow them, the way my real babies (teenagers), borrow (steal) my clothes. As much as I hate the affectation, I watermarked some of my pictures with my blogs name. My photos are not what my blog is about, and I’m not at all proud of them or particularly attached, but these watermarks are on everyone else’s posts, so I had better start peeing if I want to blog with the big boys… right?

Now, I need to pee on my words, but how can I call them my words, when they’ve all been said and written before? Are there any truly new ideas as far as stories go? Everything that is written today has been written before. Eg: The TV show “Cougar Town”, shares a theme with the 1967 film “The Graduate”, which might have come from the classic Greek tragedy “Oedipus”, which I think came from the TV show “The Brady Bunch”, because Barry Williams, (the actor who played Gregg Brady) was in love with Florence Henderson (who played his mother). So what exactly can I pee on?

With that question in mind, I’ve come up with a money making scheme that is going to be my ticket out of this dump. If I copyright a word and make everyone who wants to use it pay me, say ten cents, because I don’t want to be greedy, I could finally quit my day job and live my life my way. I just need to decide on a word… or possibly a letter would be more lucrative. I’ll let that thought marinade.

Let’s talk about big brother. This is not the first time the daily post has offered a prompt that has made me think: (thought bubble)~ Wait a minute, I just wrote about that yesterday, and today it’s the prompt?~ (end thought bubble). Weird, and annoying, because now I have to come up with something else to say about what I just wrote about. 

Let’s discuss online privacy. (Daily Post Prompt) I have six Twitter followers. It’s such an intimate number, that I could technically squeeze them all into my clown car and take them to lunch if I wanted to… we could fit in a corner booth. I don’t think any of them really read my posts. In conclusion, I could safely tweet my social security number without watermarks or repercussions. 

Facebook is the bane of my existence. I have just upwards of two hundred “friends”, a few of whom are actually frienemies. They can see all my photos and read about how great my kids are. I will link this blog occasionally, but very few (six) of those Facebook friends read anything I write. (That’s 6 Twitter followers and 6 Facebook readers… I’m well on my way to the watermark of the beast.) My privacy settings on Facebook allow only “friends” to access my photos and posts, and since I list as my residence: Port Mosby, Papua New Guinea, I think I’m safe from pop in visitors; I’ve never been to Papua New Guinea.

Regarding my lovely blog and my privacy. Well, my last name isn’t actually Alotfrom, so it might take some detective work to ascertain my true identity. I’ve kept my employers name out of my posts, as well as my job title. 

So, who should you write your checks out to for the use of the letter I plan to copyright? A post office box in Papua New Guinea perhaps? That will be determined possibly tomorrow, when I predict the daily prompt will ask: “If you were to copyright a letter of the alphabet, which would you choose, and why?”

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The Daily Post, May 30, 2015, Daily Prompt: Do Not Disturb~ How do you manage your online privacy? Are there certain things you won’t post in certain places? Information you’ll never share online? Or do you assume information about you is accessible anyway?<a href=”https://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/do-not-disturb/”>Do Not Disturb</a><a href=”https://dailypost.wordpress.com/dp_prompt/do-not-disturb/”>Do Not Disturb</a>

22 thoughts on “Life As My Dawg

  1. Please do suggest that prompt. I already have an answer. This is my favorite of all your posts! Really a very funny but very insighful essay. Love your peeing metaphor. So appropriate! I’m not sure I know how to watermark pictures. Any words of wisdom? Want to hit the “Like” button four times on this one, but then it will register as “Unlike” so I’ll do so metaphorically. Judy

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Judy! I figured this one out the same way I figured out how to install my ceiling fan, and cook spaghetti squash- Google. I do all my posting from my iPhone, so Google led me to an “App for that”. The one I purchased for $1.99 is called iWatermark. It’s very user friendly. Unfortunately, I couldn’t tell you how to do this on a device other than an iPhone. Google might know. šŸ˜‰

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      1. I think there is something on my computer that will do it. Some part of me just hates to read instructions or use the “Help” button–usually because they don’t have a category for what I want to know. Another part of me doesn’t want to mess with the pictures, but I know I should..and I’ll do it–perhaps tomorrow! Might even buy that app. It must work for a MacBook as well. Thanks for answering!

        I keep thinking about youe poem. Why didn’t someone step in and stop them? Did she live alone? How old was she?

        Liked by 1 person

      1. I didn’t share it, but just found it and read it after you mentioned it. It is heartbreaking and well written. I can’t take any credit for writing or sharing it though. šŸ˜‰

        Like

  2. Damn, Lydia…I got two postings I loved mixed up and started writing to you as though you were the other. They may take away my blog license soon. The piece I loved was yours!!! It was just a different piece that I started to replying to you about. I loved your essay about “peeing” on your words…So funny. Such a great metaphor. I also loved a poem written by someone else. These comments string out so it makes it hard not to get mixed up about what the topic of conversation is…and now I bet I’ve confused you, too. Let’s go back to the beginning. Liked your essay a lot and appreciate the tip on watermarks. END OF STORY!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. This reminded me of a conversation I had at a Christmas party three years ago when I was recovering from both my eardrums bursting. I couldn’t read lips very well. I enjoyed this! Keep your license!!

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      1. I burst bot of my eardrums on a flight to Iowa 45 years ago! I still have muffled hearing…Comes in handy at rock concerts and banda music time, but usually a pain!!! Not as much of a pain as when the eardrums burst, though…and I walked like a drunk for weeks.

        Liked by 1 person

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