Who’s Bored?

If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard “I’m bored”, I’d have a lot of nickels…probably thousands, and nickels are heavy, so I’d be pissed. I put way too much effort into entertaining my spawn when they were wee, and now that they tower over me, they obviously have a hard time maintaining the state of nirvana that was their normal back then.

And the “Worlds Greatest Mom” t-shirt goes to…roll the film clip— “Let me pull out my tap shoes and don my honking clown nose, I didn’t realize you were home from school.” “Release the jumping lipizans and hand me a those flaming batons!” 

I accept full responsibility; it’s my own fault. From the moment they could hold their own heads up in their car seats they were shuffled around town for constant lessons ranging from art to karate, gymnastics to guitar lessons, swimming, baseball, and on and on and on. I made my life much more harried than it had to be running the three of them from point A to point Z, after I had been up all night working the graveyard shift. The craziest thing is that they don’t remember most of those experiences. They just know they’re bored now. 

Today, my children are teenagers, and two of them have one foot out the door (that’s two feet in and two feet out, unless we add my sons feet, which would bring the total numbers to: four feet in, two feet out), with institutions of higher learning trying to tear them away from me. (Here’s your hat, what’s your hurry.) 

To be honest, because my children are smart they’ve learned not to utter those two words in my presence. These days I rarely hear “I’m bored”, because it elicits the same unpleasant reaction from me. The thrill seeking threesome have finally realized that I’m not going to expel flying monkeys out of my #%% for their entertainment. (If I were to do that at all it would be done in private and solely for my own entertainment.) Instead, I proudly voice all the cliche’ mom phrases that all moms throughout history have uttered: “How can you be bored when you’re room is a pig stye?” “Clean something!” “Read a book!” “Take the dogs for a walk!” “I wish I were bored!”

I do wish I were bored. Boredom is a luxury item that I do without. I know how to keep myself busy in any situation; I always have books on my phone, as well as to-do lists that I’ll never get to-do. In fact, I look forward to the twenty minutes of down time when my son is in the orthodontists chair this afternoon. “Bored…how can you be bored?”

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The Daily Post, January 21, 2016, Daily Prompt: Yawn~ What bores you? <a href=”https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/yawn/”>( YAWN )</a>

9 thoughts on “Who’s Bored?

  1. probably thousands, and nickels are heavy, so I’d be pissed – that made me laugh and my kind of sense of humor. Every time they say it, hit ’em with the nickel bag… and then add another nickel. After awhile, if you can still swing the thing… they wouldn’t want to get hit with it any longer and would motivate them not to say that phrase. (but some person would yell ‘child abuse.’ So there goes that idea.)

    Yes, my 10 and 12 year old are getting to that point. We’ve shuffled them around so much to events, but now that we are getting ready to move – no more sports, no more art and god forbid we had to disconnect the TV so dad could do some electrical work and get condo “sell ready.”

    I’m bored. There’s nothing to do.
    AND I’m HUNGRY. (you just ate)
    That was a snack. (A double cheeseburger is not a snack)
    I want something else. (no, we don’t have the $$ to keep eating)

    Do you have any homework? Any studying or special project?
    Go ride your bike. (before it gets placed in storage)
    Play your game (oh, charging? Oh, that’s too bad, so sad.)
    Want to clean?
    Then go Read a book.

    I packed everything? Oh, well, read on your tablet. Figure it out, because your boredom is your issue.

    You’re mean, mom. (Yes. I know.)

    Liked by 1 person

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