Seven Days By Any Other Name Still Make A Week

“The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers.” ~ Thomas Jefferson

“I do not take a single newspaper, nor read one a month, and I feel myself infinitely the happier for it.” ~Thomas Jefferson

“Were it left to me to decide whether we should have a government without newspapers, or newspapers without a government I should not hesitate a moment to prefer the latter.” ~Thomas Jefferson (In France, on the eve of the outbreak of the French Revolution in 1789) 

Thomas Jefferson and I share two commonalities; we have the same birthday, and we both dislike newspapers. My dislike extends to television news, and I believe his would have as well if CNN had existed in his time.  

“The only reliable truths in newspaper is in the advertisements.” ~Thomas Jefferson 

He lost me with that last comment. Newspapers also always get the date right. This is helpful information to me, because my work schedule varies from week to week, and a side effect of this lifestyle is that I’m in a constant state of confusion about what day it is. For example,  I thought yesterday was Saturday, and because today is my Friday (I have the next two days off), I had a momentary panic when I thought I had missed Friday trash pick up, but all is well because as you know, it is Monday. 

I have decided that I feel cheated by a society that has assigned each day a name, and a corresponding mood. Monday has a foggy hopeless feeling to it. I was fine today until the moment I realised what day it actually was. I felt my state of mind shift with that knowledge. Tuesday is boring. Wednesday is hump day for those of you on a traditional schedule, and as though we are all Sisyphus pushing the bolder to the peak, we anticipate a level of relief on Wednesdays. Thursday we chase the rock back down to the starting position…and it’s the night I take my trash to the curb. Friday is the day everyone but me looks forward to. Saturday is a good day to avoid any type of shopping, and Sunday is the day newspapers are on steroids. The only way I believe we can reverse these stress inducing daily stereotypes is for everyone to work a flex-schedule. Fair is fair.

That said, now that I have my facts straight, and know full well that today has been Monday all day, perhaps I should apply for the position of fact checker at a newspaper. I wonder what days they work.

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April 11, 2016, Daily One Word Prompt: Newspaper~<a href=”https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/newspaper/”>Newspaper</a&gt;

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