I must say buh bye to my beloved avocado. I cherish you, my avocado: chunks in salads, sliced in a flatbread wrap with humus, smooshed into guacamole…I could go on, but there really is no reason to torture myself because I have to break it with off—you with your good fat, yellow inside, and bumpy dark green skin—my little alligator pear.
I realize not eating you will be detrimental to my excellent health, by robbing my body of: vitamin K, folate, C, potassium, B5, B6, E, magnesium, manganese, copper, iron, zinc, phosphorous, A, B1, B2, and B3…
Enough already, in as much as you, my avocado are delicious, filling me up with your extract, which might someday relieve my inevitable future arthritis symptoms, and you might also have helped me prevent cancer…you will find someone else. You have so much to offer: you’re loaded with antioxidants that protected my eyes, the fat in you helped my body absorb more nutrients from other vegetables, you lowered my cholesterol, and you contain more potassium than bananas…you’ve been good to me, but I am done…it’s over.
Why am I breaking up, Avocado? I am poor, (middle class), and your prices are about to skyrocket. He whom shall remain nameless (Trump) is imposing a 20% tax on goods coming into the U.S. from Mexico – this is his “that makes me smart” way of getting Mexico to pay for the wall. Mexico of course will pass the 20% increase on to me, the American consumer- so I, the American consumer, will pay for the wall one way or another. But, like Mexico, I refuse to pay for the wall, so this is my farewell letter to you, Avocado. I never thought anyone could come between us, but someone (Trump) has. I suppose I could try to find a California avocado, but supply and demand will drive those prices up as well.
It was a great thing we had going, but you and I both know these things never last…I won’t be cruel and say you never tasted good… you did. You only turned brown a few times, and for that I blame myself. I just assumed you’d always be there waiting for me while I ate those damn Swedish fish.
Don’t worry about the children. I think they’ll be able to cope with some counseling. I still believe there are better ways to raise the Mexican wall money…or how about no wall jackass…sorry. Farewell avocado…don’t call me.
~TEN WAYS TO PAY FOR THE WALL – A lot from Lydia https://alotfromlydia.wordpress.com/2017/01/26/ten-ways-to-pay-for-the-wall/
January 29, 2017